Bondage Soup Recipe Book

How We Learn

Learning Philosophy

Bondage Soup is a hands-on, immersive learning experience. We learn by doing through instructor demonstrations, tie-alongs, repetition, practice, observation, feedback, video resources, and support from instructors, GAs, and fellow cohort members.

Our intensives are active learning environments. Multiple tying pairs are working at the same time, instructors and GAs move throughout the room, and there may be conversation, movement, and activity happening around you. Learning in this environment helps develop focus, communication, adaptability, and the ability to make decisions while tying.

Our instructors and GAs bring different experiences, perspectives, techniques, and approaches to rope. This is intentional. We want students to learn that there can be more than one way to understand a concept, solve a problem, or work with the person in their rope.

People learn differently, and we encourage prospective cohort members to consider how they learn best. Because Bondage Soup is a free, community-run group program, we may not be able to provide every accommodation or recreate the flexibility of private instruction.

If you have questions about whether the learning environment will work for you, we encourage you to talk with instructors, GAs, or graduates before applying. We want you to understand what the experience is actually like so you can make an informed decision about whether Bondage Soup is a good fit for you.

What to Expect From the Intensives

At Bondage Soup, we believe the most effective way to foster both skill development and community is through an intense, immersive experience. BoSo's founder, instructors, GAs, and alumni adapt and refine the curriculum based on discoveries made since the program’s inception in 2018, feedback from nearly 150 graduates, and insights gained from experts outside of the BoSo community.

Our intensives are designed to help tying pairs build a strong foundation in both technical and interpersonal skills. Each monthly intensive is a six-hour, hands-on learning experience that focuses on a progressive curriculum, reinforcing skills learned in previous sessions. Students who dedicate a minimum of 4+ hours per week to practice between sessions tend to thrive in the program.

Monthly Intensive Structure

Session Timing and Schedule

Intensives are held once a month, typically on the first or second Sunday, and are approximately 6 hours long. Each intensive combines technical rope skills with communication, consent, negotiation, body awareness, risk awareness, and decision-making. These are all essential parts of learning rope.

January

The first intensive establishes the foundation for the year. We review the Bondage Soup Recipe Book, discuss cohort expectations, and introduce consent and negotiation, risk awareness, rope selection, rope handling, and several stable, non-collapsing single column ties.

February Through November

The curriculum is progressive, so each intensive builds on the skills and concepts learned in previous months.

Each intensive generally includes:

• Proficiency: Tying pairs demonstrate their understanding of material from the previous month. Proficiency includes both the how and the why. Feedback is part of the process and helps identify what is working and what needs more attention.

• Instruction and Practice: New material is introduced through demonstration, explanation, and tie-alongs with support from instructors and GAs.

• Tie, Untie, Retie: Repetition is an important part of how we learn. Tying pairs are given opportunities to practice new material multiple times, ask questions, make corrections, and build repeatability.

• Community Potluck: Each intensive includes a 30-45 minute potluck. Sharing a meal gives the cohort time to connect outside of the curriculum and is an important part of our time together.

• Integration: As the curriculum progresses, tying pairs are asked to connect previously learned skills with new material, make informed decisions, communicate with one another, and understand why they are making the choices they make.

During the year, each tying pair will also complete at least one proficiency in front of the cohort. This provides an opportunity to practice maintaining communication, focus, and technique while other people are watching.

December Graduation

The final intensive is our graduation. Each tying pair presents a 10-minute rope-focused performance for the cohort and Bondage Soup graduates, bringing together the skills, partnership, and experiences developed throughout the year.

Joining Bondage Soup

Application Process

The Bondage Soup application process is designed to be fair, transparent, and community involved. You do not need previous rope experience to apply. We are looking for tying pairs who understand the commitment they are making and are ready to participate in the full 12-month program.

Learn More Before You Apply

If you are considering Bondage Soup, we encourage you to talk with graduates, instructors, and GAs. They can share their experiences and answer questions about the curriculum, time commitment, cohort environment, and what participating in Bondage Soup is actually like.

Eligibility and Application Requirements

Apply as a Tying Pair

Bondage Soup is designed for tying pairs, with one person tying and one person being tied for the duration of the program. Both people must submit their own application and commit to participating together for the full year. We welcome tying pairs with different experiences, bodies, identities, backgrounds, and relationships to rope.

Read the Recipe Book

Both applicants are required to read the Bondage Soup Recipe Book before applying. It explains how the program works, what you can expect from us, and what will be expected from you. The goal is to give you enough information to decide together whether Bondage Soup is the right learning environment and commitment for your partnership.

Application Period

Applications open October 1 and remain open through October 31, or until we receive 40 tying pair applications, whichever comes first. Once 40 tying pairs have applied, applications close so that our graduate interviewers can give each application and interview appropriate consideration.

Because applications may close before October 31, we encourage interested tying pairs to apply early.

Bondage Soup Alumni Reapplication

Bondage Soup graduates may return to complete the program once in the other role. This gives alumni the opportunity to experience the curriculum from a different perspective while continuing to make space for new people to participate in Bondage Soup.

If you are considering returning in a different role, we ask that you spend some time outside of the cohort first. Use what you learned, continue developing your rope practice, stay connected to the community, and look for opportunities to pay some of what you received forward.

Reapplying as a Top

Graduates who completed Bondage Soup as a bottom may apply to return as a top when:

• You have completed the program and received your graduation patch.

• At least one full year has passed since your graduation.

• You have made a meaningful effort to contribute back to the Bondage Soup community.

• You have not previously completed Bondage Soup as a top.

A maximum of four alumni tying pair applications will be considered each year.

There is no checklist for paying it forward. Supporting a cohort, serving as a GA, helping with events, mentoring, sharing knowledge, or simply giving your time and energy to the community can all be meaningful contributions.

Reapplying as a Bottom

Graduates who completed Bondage Soup as a top may apply to return as a bottom with a non-graduate top. The one-year waiting period does not apply.

Applying With a New Partner

If your tying partner has not graduated from Bondage Soup, they will complete the standard application. Returning alumni will complete the alumni application. Applying as an alumnus does not guarantee selection.

After Completing Both Roles

Bondage Soup may be completed once as a top and once as a bottom. After graduating in both roles, there are many other ways to continue learning and participating through Soup Kitchen, Test Kitchen, teaching, mentoring, serving as a GA, and the wider rope community.

Interview Process

Once the application window closes, the interview process begins in late October and continues throughout November. Applicants will be contacted to arrange an interview. Our interviewers are experienced individuals who have successfully completed the Bondage Soup program and are familiar with the learning environment and cohort dynamics. This is a two-way conversation designed to ensure both BoSo and the applicant are a good fit for one another.

Interview Format

Interviews may be conducted via telephone, video chat (e.g., Zoom or FaceTime), or in-person, depending on the preferences and comfort of both the applicant and the interviewer. Interviewers will not include any alumni currently applying to join the cohort, ensuring impartiality.

Interview Content

During the interview, you will have an opportunity to:

• Review and clarify your application responses.

• Discuss your motivations and expectations for the program.

• Demonstrate your understanding of the Bondage Soup Recipe Book.

• Ask any questions you may have about the program, time commitment, or the cohort experience.

Selection Process

After interviews are complete, Bondage Soup graduates gather for the Selection Meeting. Interviewers assess each tying pair using the same readiness framework:

Strong Fit: The tying pair shows clear readiness for the program and its commitment, with no unresolved concerns.

Good Fit: The tying pair meets readiness expectations and could do well in the program. Some unknowns or growth areas may exist, but there are no significant concerns.

Not a Great Fit This Cycle: The tying pair may not be the right fit for this year's cohort because of timing, capacity, alignment, or readiness. This is not a judgment of their potential or value.

These categories are not rankings of applicants against one another. They help us determine readiness for this particular learning environment and commitment.

Final Selection

Ten tying pairs are invited to join the January through December cohort.

Tying pairs identified as Strong Fit are considered first. If additional spaces remain, Good Fit tying pairs are considered for the remaining openings.

Final selection also considers the cohort as a whole. A cohort spends a year learning, practicing, problem solving, sharing meals, and growing together. We consider how different personalities, experiences, perspectives, learning styles, and approaches may come together to create a well-rounded and cohesive group.

This does not mean we are looking for ten tying pairs who are alike. A strong cohort benefits from difference. The goal is to bring together people who are ready for Bondage Soup and who can learn alongside and contribute to one another throughout the year.

Because we often have more qualified applicants than available spaces, being a good fit for Bondage Soup does not guarantee a place in that year's cohort.

Notification

All applicants will be contacted by mid-December, regardless of the outcome. Tying pairs invited to join the cohort will receive information about preparing for January.

Applicants who are not selected are welcome to apply again in a future year.

Key Dates

• October 1st: Applications Open.

• October 31st: Applications Close (or when application capacity is reached).

• Late October - November: Interview Period.

• Early December: Selection Meeting.

• Mid-December: Applicants Notified of Results.

• January: Program Begins.

Your Commitment to the Cohort

When Life Happens

We understand that illness, emergencies, work, family, and unexpected circumstances happen. Communicate with us as early as possible when something affects your ability to attend or participate.

Attendance matters because Bondage Soup is progressive. Each intensive builds on the material taught in the months before it, and both people in the tying partnership need to be prepared for what comes next.

If the bottom cannot attend an intensive, the top may request to work with a GA or Bondage Soup graduate.

If the top cannot attend, the bottom may audit the intensive or request to work with a GA or graduate.

Any missed intensive requires a make-up class. It is the partnership’s responsibility to arrange the required make-up with an instructor. Make-up classes are held virtually and are offered at an additional cost. Both partners are required to attend the make-up together, and it must be completed before the next intensive.

The make-up ensures that both partners have received the missed curriculum and are prepared to continue with the cohort as the curriculum progresses.

If a Tying Partnership Ends

Bondage Soup is designed around a committed tying partnership. If a tying pair can no longer continue together during the year, both people will generally leave the cohort.

Coachability

Being coachable is an expectation of Bondage Soup. Come prepared to receive instruction, ask questions, hear feedback, make corrections, and try again. This applies regardless of how much rope experience you have when you enter the program.

During intensives, we ask tying pairs to learn and practice the curriculum as it is taught until proficiency is demonstrated. Understanding the structure and reasoning first gives you the tools to make thoughtful adaptations later.

Mistakes are part of learning. You may be asked to slow down, change something, untie, retie, or approach a problem differently.

Limits and Limitations

Knowing your current limits is part of becoming more proficient in rope. This includes physical limits, technical limits, gaps in knowledge, and recognizing when something is beyond your current skill level.

We expect both people in the tying partnership to communicate honestly about their limits, assess what is happening, ask for help when needed, and make decisions appropriate to their current abilities.

Those limits will change as you learn and gain experience. Knowing when to continue, when to adapt, and when not to do something are all part of developing good judgment in rope.

Accountability

Being part of Bondage Soup means being accountable to yourself, your tying partner, your cohort, and the larger community. Cohort members are expected to practice the values described throughout this Recipe Book, including consent, communication, respect, adaptability, and accountability.

If you have a concern about another community member, direct communication is encouraged when it feels appropriate. You are not required to approach someone directly if you are uncomfortable doing so or believe another approach would be more appropriate. Concerns may be brought to an instructor, GA, or Bondage Soup leadership.

When concerns cannot be resolved informally or require further action, decisions regarding participation and accountability are made by founder Natalie Rose in consultation with senior Bondage Soup instructors, GAs, and graduates.

Accountability is not about expecting perfection. It is about how we respond when something needs attention.

What You Can Expect From Us

What to Expect From Instructors and GAs

Volunteer Instruction

Bondage Soup instructors and GAs volunteer their time, knowledge, and experience to support the cohort. Although there is no tuition for the program, Bondage Soup requires a meaningful commitment of time and effort from everyone involved. Instructors and GAs will provide the resources and support for learning, while each tying partnership remains responsible for its own progress.

Experience and Support

Every instructor has completed the 12-month Bondage Soup program and continues learning through education and experience both inside and outside the Bondage Soup community. GAs are graduates who return to support the cohort while continuing to develop their own skills. You can expect the instructional team to be approachable, engaged, and willing to ask for or defer to additional experience when needed.

Teaching Approach

Curriculum is taught through explanation, demonstration, tie-alongs, practice, and feedback. Permission will always be requested before touching you, your rope, or your equipment. Tying pairs are expected to learn and practice the material as taught until proficiency is demonstrated. From there, informed adaptations and individual choices are encouraged as understanding develops.

Support Between Intensives

Learning continues between intensives. Instructors, GAs, graduates, the BoSo Discord, Soup Kitchen, and other community opportunities can provide additional places to ask questions, practice, and receive feedback. We encourage cohort members to use these resources throughout the year.

Feedback

Bondage Soup continues to evolve through the experiences and feedback of cohort members, graduates, instructors, and GAs. Questions, concerns, suggestions, and feedback are always welcome.

You can talk with an instructor or GA, reach out through Discord, or use the anonymous feedback option available through Cohort Access on BondageSoup.com.

We take feedback seriously and consider it alongside the goals, values, and needs of the program. Not every suggestion will result in a change, but thoughtful feedback helps us continue learning and improving.

Graduation and What Comes Next

Graduation

Graduation from Bondage Soup is a significant achievement, earned by fulfilling the expectations outlined throughout the program. To graduate, each cohort member must attend all twelve (12) intensives or pass all ten (10) proficiencies, and every tying pair must perform in the graduation performance.

Graduates receive a patch featuring the original Bondage Soup logo in recognition of completing the program.

The patch represents the foundation you have built throughout the year: technical skills, communication, adaptability, decision-making, and a toolkit you can continue using and developing in your rope practice.

It also represents your place within the Bondage Soup community and connects you to the graduates who came before you and those who will come after.

Graduation does not mean you know everything there is to know about rope. It means you have built a foundation and have more tools to decide where you want to go next.

Post-Graduation

Graduation opens up more ways to participate in the Bondage Soup community. There is no single expectation for what involvement should look like, but graduates are encouraged to continue learning, stay connected, and pay knowledge forward when and how it makes sense for them.

Graduates are invited to participate in Soup Kitchen, support current cohort members, assist with the interview and selection process, attend community events, and continue learning from instructors and rope practitioners both inside and outside Bondage Soup. Graduates who meet the eligibility requirements may also apply for Test Kitchen.

Some graduates choose to become Graduate Assistants. GAs support the current cohort by answering questions, offering feedback, assisting instructors, and sharing their experience with newer participants. For some, this also becomes an opportunity to develop their teaching and facilitation skills.

Some GAs later become Bondage Soup instructors. Instructor roles develop through experience, continued learning, demonstrated technical understanding, and the ability to effectively support others. More complex and risk-sensitive curriculum is taught by instructors with the appropriate experience.

Teaching is one way to pay knowledge forward, but it is not the only way. Graduates contribute by practicing together, mentoring, performing, sharing knowledge, volunteering, supporting events, bringing new perspectives back to the community, or simply continuing to participate.

Growth and Continuation

Since 2018, Bondage Soup has grown into a community of more than 100 graduates, current cohort members, instructors, and GAs. Graduates have gone on to teach, perform, present, mentor, and contribute throughout the wider rope community, often bringing what they learn back to Bondage Soup.

There is no single way to stay involved after graduation. Some graduates return as GAs or instructors. Others participate in Soup Kitchen, continue their education through Test Kitchen, support new cohort members, perform, teach, or simply remain connected to the people they learned alongside.